Top ten things said by Christmas shoppers while losing their mind waiting in the cashier's line.
10. Oh my god! If this line moves any slower, we'll be celebrating Christmas right here.
9. Will you hold my place in line? I have to go to the bathroom.
8. I hate Christmas and all the commercialism. I hate that slow-ass cashier and I hate you. Bah Humbug.
7. I think the Christmas song, “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” is so depressing. Don't you?
6. Will you hold my place in line? I think I'll grab another pair of crotchless panties for my girlfriend.
5. My wife asked me what I really wanted for Christmas and I said, “to sleep with Katy Perry.” Now we're getting a divorce.
4. That guy has a hundred items and we're in the express lane. I say we choke him. C'mon people! Who's with me?
3. Can I go ahead of you? I'm one of Santa's elves.
2. It's a Snuggie. Who doesn't want one of these for Christmas?
And the number one thing said by Christmas shoppers while losing their mind waiting in the cashier's line... Jiggity jig, heehaw heehaw, it's Dominick the Donkey. Jiggity jig, heehaw heehaw, the Italian Christmas Donkey. La la la...