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The Unknown Blogger

Posts from May 2012

Katy, Apple and Bananas
Apple and Katy Perry have paired up together to bring you iBanana – the first iPhone that looks like a banana.   My unreliable sources tell me the iBanana will be on the cutting edge of smartphone technology, featuring Apple’s latest iOS 5.1.2 and of course great gadgets like an 8 megapixel camera/video recorder and a tiny little blender for making daiquiris.

In a recent phone interview I had with Miss Perry, I asked her who came up with fruity phone idea. “I love eating bananas and I love talking on the phone,” said Katy, “So I thought wouldn’t be great if I could talk on the phone and then eat it when I hung up.”

Unknown Blogger: So you’ll be able to eat the iBanana?

Katy Perry: No. it’s made of metal and plastic. Hmmm, maybe I need to rethink my endorsement of iBanana.

Unknown Blogger:  Maybe iBanana could come with a bunch of real bananas and you could eat those.

Katy Perry: Ummm. I guess. Yeah! That would work! Whew. Yeah!

Unknown Blogger: You're a genius.

Katy Perry: Awww. Thank you.
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Tags :  
Topics: Human Interest
People: AppleKaty Perry

LMFAO Wins Best Lip Sync at BBMA 2012
Electropop, whatever duo LMFAO won Best Lip Sync at the 2012 Billboard Music Awards last night for their brilliant hit “Party Rock Anthem.” Faux singers Redfoo and SkyBlu were obviously pleased to win the prestigious award and said, “It’s an honor to know that the industry can recognize crappy music when they kinda hear it.”

LMFAO also took home an award for Duo with the Frizziest Hair as well as Singers Most Likely to Catch Flies with Their Mouths Open While Lip Syncing.
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Boy Loves Good Humor and a Good Pair of Underwear
Six-year old Toby Fauntleroy of Bangor, Maine has been banned from the local Good Humor ice cream truck – not because little Toby typically only wears a pair of chocolate stained underpants while out in public, but because the truck cannot hold enough ice cream to satisfy little Fauntleroy’s insatiable appetite. Eyewitnesses have stated that Toby screams and throws a temper tantrum when the Good Humor is all gone, causing everyone to run for cover.

In a recent interview, Mr. Cheeseballski, owner and operator of the Good Humor truck said, “Personally, I think the kid has a funny little eatin’ problem and could stand to lose a couple pounds.” Mr. Cheeseballski went on to add that it is a little disturbing to not only watch Toby put down so much ice cream but that Toby also stores all his ice cream money in his underpants. “It just somehow doesn’t seem right to take money from a little kid while he’s only wearing underwear and pulling five and ten dollar bills from his crotch and butt cheeks - enough is enough and it’s never enough for little Toby Fauntleroy.” said Mr. Cheeseballski.
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Tags :  
Locations: Maine
People: CheeseballskiLoves GoodToby Fauntleroy

Donald Trump is Changing His Name
Billionaire Donald Trump and host of Celebrity Apprentice recently admitted in the board room during one of the Celebrity Apprentice episodes that his last name really isn’t Trump. In a Celebrity Apprentice shocker, Donald admitted his real name is Donald Duck.

“I know you think I’m joking,” said Mr. Duck “but for a long time I was ashamed of my real last name but I’m not ashamed of it anymore.” Lisa Lampanelli, comedian and contestant on Celebrity Apprentice, asked Donald why he is revealing his real name now to which Donald quipped “Because I’m rich and if people don’t like that my real name is Donald Duck, I’ll simply have them roughed up by some of my tough friends.” to which Lisa replied “Like who, Mickey Mouse and Pluto?”
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